Thursday, August 6, 2009

Unexpected trip to Utah...

WARNING:this is a long post without any pictures I apologize but as this is kind of my journal, I needed to write my thoughts about my Grandmas passing. So feel free to skip this post if you want.

A couple of weeks ago I was told my Grandmother was not doing well, for days I had struggled with the decision of weather I should go out and say my goodbyes I didn't want to see her in the state she was in and I had come to terms that I would just come out for a funeral. The closer time got for her to go My thoughts kept coming back to the fact I was the only one living out of state that has not seen or talked to her face to face I worried that Grandma was holding out to say her goodbyes before she left this earth. Chris was very supportive and was with me in what ever decision I made. While my best friend Candice was here visiting I got a call and I knew I needed to be in Utah. I quickly made phone calls to Southwest hoping to be on a Sunday flight leaving close to the same time Candice would be leaving. They had nothing..the soonest they could get me out was Monday morning not arriving until 2 in the afternoon. I just prayed that it wouldn't be to late and booked the flight. Sunday after we got home from church I just had a feeling to call the airport and check on flights They had one seat leaving at 5:45 I called Chris and he made arrangements to get off work early to take us to the airport. In a whirlwind Candice and I quickly packed and within an hour we were on our way to the airport. My Dad met Annie and I at the airport where Annie gave one of her first smiles to Papou. it was very sweet. I figured that we would go home and then go to the care center first thing in the morning instead we made our way straight to the care center where many of the family was waiting. My heart was nervous for the same reasons I struggled to get to Utah in the first place, I didn't want to see Grandma this way, But I knew that I would regret it if I didn't. I walked in to a room full loving family surrounded by Grandma both happy and sad to see us walking in the door. Grandma was pretty out of it so I just sat by her side and held her hand and told her I loved her. One touching thing that happened after we arrived was Annie started to cry and My mom said to grandma "Mom, Corine brought Annie can you hear that sweet cry?" just then Grandma had a tear in her eye. I was glad she responded and hope that Annie will have that special bond to her great grandma even if she never remembers her. After visiting for a while we made our way home and I couldn't help to feel bad that I really didn't get to talk to Grandma and I was sad for my own selfish reasons. In the morning I talked to Chris on the phone and cried telling him that it was hard to see Grandma this way but how glad I was to be there. We got dressed and headed back to the care center. As we walked in to Grandmas room I looked at Grandma and she had life in her eyes I knew that Grandma knew I needed to see her eyes this way, she looked at me and said hi and told me she loved me. We showed Grandma Annie again and Grandma was able to kiss her newest great grand baby. Later that afternoon Grandma asked for a blessing not long after the beautiful blessing the life in her eyes left again and she was in that state until she passed from this earth Wednesday morning. As the family had made funeral arrangements, I again for my own selfish reasons was sad that Chris Ty and Lucy weren't going to be there with me. That night Chris called and told me he got his vacation switched around and was on their way the next morning Because He just felt that he and the kids needed to be there. If any of you know Chris and his schedule it is unheard of to be able to switch vacations and get shifts covered for a week in a matter of hours. I truly believe that our family and our needs are being looked out for. and I am so grateful for that. The next week was kind of a whirlwind, Chris' Uncle had passed away that weekend as well so on Sunday we went to his viewing, Monday we had Grandma's viewing And the the funeral on Tuesday. We had the rest of the week to fit in the things we had arranged for our week vacation in August including Annie's Blessing just hours before packing up the car to head home. We had a swim party at Chris' sister Susanne's house, Chris and Ty went fishing with Chris' Grandpa. And we were able to fit in a little time to visit with friends in between. Sad that we missed out on seeing some of our other friends. but with so little time we took what we could get. We were exhausted by the end of the week but everything seemed to work out and in all reality I felt that we had more time with our family this week than we would have when we were supposed to come in mid August. so I am glad that we had that quality family time.


Becca said...

Corine, I know how hard it is to see a grandparent dying. Truly, the Lord was watching over you and your family. So many tender mercies you have received during this experience! Remember, it is okay to mourn. "Thou shalt live together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die" (D&C 42:45)

I'm thinking of you,

Mick and Tiff said...

So sorry for you loss. That is always a hard thing to go through. We went through the same thing last summer and I still get sad thinking about my grandma. It is good to keep talking about them and remember the good times.

Summer said...

I am so sorry, Corrine. I am glad you got to see her though, before she passed. She is very lucky to have such a loving granddaughter like you.
I am really not looking forward for any of my Grandparents to pass. I'm too close to them and I keep telling them they have to live forever.

Annie looks so cute in blessing dress!

Amanda, Jared and Camden said...

I was so sorry to hear about your grandma. I hope you and your family are doing well. Im glad you were able to be here to see her. I know that probably meant alot to her. I had heard you were in town and wanted to see you but i figured you would be busy. I would love to get together next time for sure. I miss you. Hope you are well

Love you